Tag Archives: parenting skills

TO PARENTS: TEACH WITHOUT VIOLENCE

It is funny how adults feel offended or upset when their fellow adult slaps them but they do not think about how a child feels when they slap them. YES, you are older than the child, YES, that is your child or YES, you are trying to correct the child or teach the child. These are some justifications for hitting a child but it is not justified when your fellow colleague or friend slaps you because they are correcting you.

The context of teaching a child without violence such as corporal punishment has been debatable over the years. Protagonists and Antagonists of Corporal punishment also known as Physical punishment agree to the same context that corporal punishment is to inflict pain on a child to curb a child’s behavior. However, in the argument of the Antagonists, the use of corporal punishment encourages a violent society by teaching us that the means of teaching, learning, correcting behavior is not effective without violence, hence, leading to an increase in aggressive people. In addition, there are several negative factors of the use of violence (corporal punishment) such as the mental health of the child and physical injuries which has led to the death of some children.

Whist I was (still) undergoing my doctoral research, I have understood that the term “violence” is very broad and some persons do not consider “corporal punishment” as a form of violence. Examples of violence against children are child slavery, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, negligence, violent psychological discipline, physical abuse (corporal punishment and many more. These examples are confirmed by the World Health Organization (WHO), UNICEF and some other international organization reports that are aimed at protecting or safeguarding children. At what point do we draw a line between the use of physical punishment and the excessive use of physical punishment? Some proponents have argued that the administration of corporal punishment (physical punishment) should be limited to certain numbers of strokes or flogging and on a particular part of a child’s body, that will not cause injuries or harm to a child.

Back in secondary school, I remember how the teachers whip us (the students) and this did not have a positive impact as we adapted to the violence and did not learn to stop the bad behavior, rather we found alternatives to avoid getting caught. A lot of students especially the senior students exhibited this act on the junior students and even their mates. This increased the rate of violence and aggression amongst friends, siblings and colleagues.

I strongly advice that the use of violence to discipline a child is not the best and it has been proven from several medical, psychological and social research.

Feel free to drop your opinion about the use of violence (corporal punishment) to discipline a child.

HELPING YOUR CHILD BUILD A CAREER

After the birth of a child, the roles parents play in the life of the children is activated up until the child becomes an adult and is capable of making reasonable and quality decision.

These roles are biological, social, psychological, financial dimensions. Amongst all these, parents are responsible for preparing their children for their future. However, one way of doing this is by helping to shed light and directions as to the child’s choice ofcareer. Parents serve as a major influence in their children’s career development and career decision- making.

This could be done by the following suggestions:

-Ensure that there is a strong relationship between you and the child, as this would allow the child relate with you on such issues. This will enhance a good understanding of the child, therefore, as a parent you will understand the child interests and observe the child’s passion.

– Avoid over indulgence in the child’s life. Yes, it is good to interfere in the activities of the child, however, it over indulgence might make the child withdraw in certain areas. Note that every human loves to be free.

– Give the children independence, let them know what it means to be independent.

– Listen to child and avoid imposing your point of view on the child.( it is the direction that is required).

– Advise the child on decisions made by them and not commanding the child and and imposing their own goals on to the child or seeing their child’s accomplishments as a reflection on themselves.

-Support the child’s decisions. Shooting down the child decision outrightly would discourage the child.

I do hope the few point would help you now or in the nearest future x